![]() Here is what drives me crazy about being sick: January was a blur of cold medicine, Kleenex, phlegm and doctor visits. Plus the smoggy inversion allows particles of radioactive pollution to filter down to the lower lobes of the lungs, causing all kinds of respiratory problems. Besides, everyone in Utah has a cold because It’s WINTER. I’m tired of whining, and everyone in my family is sick of hearing me whine. 1, I’ve had colds, laryngitis, a sore throat, a short-lived case of the flu and a sinus infection. Luckily, I found a spot where we only had to walk five blocks, go up seven flights of stairs and run across several busy streets. Like everything in Salt Lake City, parking is unusually difficult. It didn’t help that a toddler was screeching like a cat in heat, but on top of that, it seemed EVERY dancer in the ballet had to perform a solo/duet. (Picture this with a great big head covering the dancer.)Ĥ. I could see half of the stage fine, but my granddaughter had a very obstructed view. ![]() Our seats were placed directly behind the big heads of the people in front of us. Unless you’re willing to fork out big bucks, your seats will be crap. Do you mind if I taze your screaming child?”ģ. What the hell were you thinking? And when the child started shrieking during the last act, the mother WOULD NOT TAKE HIM OUT OF THE THEATER. The woman who brought her TWO-YEAR-OLD to a TWO HOUR ballet. I turned around to give him my Angry Mom glare. The man behind me who kept reading his program using his cell phone as a flashlight. The costumes were gorgeous, and everything was wonderful–except:ġ. (Only in ballet is floating around in a big leaf acceptable.) I took my 10-year-old granddaughter to her first ballet in the newly renovated Capitol Theatre to watch Ballet West’s The Sleeping Beauty. My husband would rather undergo a bone marrow transplant than watch a ballet, so I’ve endured a ballet drought for years. So I stopped dancing, but continued to love ballet. It was a horrible moment when I understood I would never dance the pas de deux (French for “graceful stumbling”) from Swan Lake. I danced for eight more years before realizing most ballerinas weren’t 5’9″ with size 10 feet. ![]() However, Ballet West wasn’t hiring kindergarteners, so I had to put my dream on hold for a while. When I was five, I decided to be a ballerina. They tend to flock together, like beautiful muscular swans. I guess all that walking and flexing is workout enough. I’ve never actually seen them pick up any weights. The Hotties: Men and women who KNOW they look good, and strut around the weight room, making sure everyone gets a good look. I’d offer to help, but that would involve me talking to people. They usually land on a treadmill for the entire month. The January Bunch: This assortment of people always seem a little lost, wandering from machine to machine, trying to figure out each machine’s appropriate use. They can also read, watch TV and crochet while exercising. The Super-Social: Usually women, this group tends to flock around exercise equipment to discuss kids, spouses, dinner, shopping, the latest craft trend, decorating, laundry, jobs and troubled celebrities. ![]() They don’t chit-chat, they don’t waste time. They plug-in their iPods, tune out the world, do their workout and leave. The Anti-Social: These people are there to WORK OUT. It doesn’t matter if their bad exercise form will cause severe injuries (for themselves or others), the fact they lift 80 pounds for bicep curls makes them happy. The Soon-To-Be-Injured: Typically male, this group flings heavy weights around like paper airplanes. I’m never quite sure if they need medical attention. I’ve narrowed them down into the following categories: ![]() Resolutioners hit the treadmills and ellipticals for eight weeks–then quit.ĭuring the last few weeks, I’ve noticed distinct personality trends in gym goers. Because for the last two months, the workout place near my home has been PACKED. Now that February is winding down, people will stop going to the gym. ![]()
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